Seth Rogen pees on girls!

February 6, 2011

For the first time ever, I dreamt that I woke up and wrote down my dreams! Figured it would happen some time, but I had no idea that the dreams to follow would be this AWESOME.

I’m in some kind of technology store, messing around with the iPod docks and Blackberrys. I notice on one of the Blackberrys that my cousin(who is in Australia..) had previously texted someone from that exact handset. In the corner of the technology store, there is shelf of woolen Nike AF1 rip-offs. I show them to my mum. She likes them. I look outside the window, and there’s at least a metre of snow pressed against the glass. I clear snow from around the building and come back inside, only to notice that the building is now my house. My Dad asks about the snow, and I give him a detailed report.

The house is then suddenly full of family members and randoms, and its also no longer my house, but somewhere that still looks weirdly familiar. My brother lights up a fag in front of my dad (something which isn’t a big deal, but would be hilarious in reality). In the living room of the house is a little kid/borderline baby chillin with his mum. The baby holds on to my arm and starts to walk, maybe its first steps ever. Get this. Gradually the kid appears to growing as it walks! He looks at me, wearing a little hat, and asks ‘are we upside down?’. I say no, getting a cheap laugh from those in attendance. I then walk outside of the house, to find my 40-year-old cousin showing off his new remote control car, and he’s genuinely excited. It breaks. He’s depressed.

Then it gets REALLY good. I’m now in a weird scenario, with my friend D. For some weiirrdd reason, the whole situation feels like the movie ‘Paul’ (with Seth Rogen as an alien), and D is most definitely a human version of Paul the alien. So much so that he actually looks a little like Rogen in the dream! We go to some rural field, where theres some hot girls watching a sport of some kind. D starts pissing on them!! Honestly, just straight up pees on the hot girls. They hate it, and I’m crying with laughter.

I love this next one. We’re driving on a highway, somewhere sunny, in a big people carrier. A friend is in the seat next to me, with a camera, and is taking pictures left right and centre. Now here’s the cool part – everything looks slightly blurred and vivid, with the sky bright blue and everything looking awesome. Hard to explain, but the best comparison would be that it looked like those snowboard videos that are actually pretty new but look hella old. Anyway, my vision had an old-tint to it, and it was awesome. My friend takes a picture of me, but then holds the camera right against my face and it starts to shock me, slowly building (kinda felt like when you lick a 9V battery, which is somehow getting stronger…).  As I get shocked, my dream switches to the 3rd person, but instead of seeing myself being shocked, I actually see some country-ass bum reacting to being shocked! So fucking weird.